yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
