shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I'm just crazy horny about you
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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