Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
