Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
