Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
