Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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