Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize