You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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