Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
