you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
