Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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