Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
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