i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
