That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
