where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
