She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize
