My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
