his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize