No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize