yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
