Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
