Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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