Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
