Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
