Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
