U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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