At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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