Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
