I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize