If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
one might say we're banned from that church
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize