That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
