I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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