We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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