I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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