i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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