I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize