I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
