We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Randomize
