i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
