dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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