Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
