Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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