the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
