How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
