So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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