And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
