remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
