the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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