Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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