dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
