It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
